Tuesday, June 17, 2014

Early Morning flashback: (Unedited): 17 June 2014:

About  (7A.M.) this morning. Adults Discovered two young children (3-4Yr. old's) walking alone in their night clothes. Rowen/hwy 54 Dollar General parking lot area. The woman from the dry cleaners took responsibility. Another woman was able to get the little girl before she could approach Hwy 54. Saving their lives. An outstanding Pasco deputy already at the dry cleaners next to the Pasco Sheriff's substation.Please pray for these children. It was obvious to me that the little girl was angry. Not scared and not upset. The little boy was scared and remained with the dry cleaning lady as the little girl walked away from adults as she was going towards Hwy 54. She almost made it past the CVS Pharmacy. That is how close she was from the main HWY.

New Port Richey, Florida. 34655
Pasco Square
https://www.google.com/maps/@28.2175402,-82.6936344,227m/data=!3m1!1e3
There have been many deaths along this stretch of Hwy 54 in the last many months.
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This is how a flash back can begin as it has done with me this morning. I immediately remembered and almost being a young child again. Both adoptive parents hung over from a night of drinking and fighting and I often times awoke to the silence of the morning. It is amazing how loud the silence can be. The strangeness of silence, almost unnaturally disturbing. No one to see to my needs or fix me breakfast. Unable to wake them up. So, outside I go as often was the case. Although much older than the two children of this morning. Maybe 6 or 7 years old.  Not to be seen or heard from for hours. They never cared enough to inquired as to my whereabouts. I guess they knew I would be back eventually. This of course would lead to needing money for food and I would take some money out of dad's wallet. I did that when I could other times. I was eating out of trash cans behind the Burger king, Clearwater 4 movie theater and a pizza place down the road on Gulf to bay Blvd, in Clearwater. 
Sometimes i would go to my friends house a couple of doors down to sit with Jeff. Eat cereal and watch cartoons. That was if he was awake and they didn't go out on their boat. Yes, I was up that early and outside. riding my bike around and not seeing anyone awake or outside. I guess I was fortunate enough to live in a good neighborhood and being adopted my a dad who had a good job working with rockets. Dad always had cash. That is what defined our relationship. His cash. I never wanted his cash. Just his love and acceptance. Which i never have gotten. A guy as intelligent as he was to adopt a child for his wife. The paper work on my adoption even said at least a high IQ along with other lies about the biological parents. Those lies made for a good sell of a baby. Dad knew he was deceived in taking this baby with an IQ of about 70.
I remember we had wicker type of furniture for furniture as well as a green recliner chair for dad. I would hide their liquor bottles and beer under the furniture and in other places in the house. They never even realized until one day I saw dozens of liquor bottles on the cabinet counter. I guess this is the thinking of a child. If I hide the liquor and beer they will stop drinking. I even did that with the boxes of cigarettes.
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The early morning travels I went on with my bike. The freedom was exhilarating. Can you imagine a 6-8 year old kid riding a bike from the area around the Clearwater campus of St.Petersburg college to Clearwater Beach, Clearwater mall, Countryside mall, Safety Harbor, Dunedin. Hiding under the railroad tracks under US Hwy 19. Those were my stomping grounds.  I was never even aware of homeless people and some of the dangers that were around. But, I always had that spider sense which would stop me and cause me to alter course. Maybe, That spider sense was really an angel watching over me. When no one else was. I should not have survived my childhood. There is no logical way I should have. Especially, when The adoptive mother tried to kill me many times. But, That was several decades ago.
Today, I have a family with children.
It is never Gods fault for whatever bad and sad things have been done to you. It is always the fault of bad people doing bad things to you. It isn't even your fault. Just as it wasn't my fault. If they had not of adopted me. They would have adopted someone else and all of those bad things to that other unknown child.
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I've done a little research on my adopted dad. If he had accepted a senators invitation to go to a premier military academy after high school. Then he would have never met his insane wife. Yes, Dad was that intelligent. To be recognized as that intelligent by a state politician. He could instantly do any math in his head faster than you could pull out your calculator brains from your techno nerd shirt pocket.  I think when you are born with a profound gift. Maybe, you are supposed to use for the benefit of humanity. Even if your a pacifists.
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That's all. The flashback seems to be over now.


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