A bad and terrible thing has happened. Maybe, this bad and terrible has happened to you. Maybe there is an infinite number of bad and terrible things which has happened to you. What do you do? Where do you go from here? How do you resolve them?
What if you think your at fault? Well are you?
It is difficult to live the life you have had. But, the longer you choose to remain within those bad and sad memories of the past. Also, means that the joy and happiness you so desperately want and need will also not be possible or just fleeting. So how can you obtain joy and happiness after have suffered through years or decades of abuse and torture? Well, are you reading this? I cannot say that I know your pain and what you have gone through. But, I do know this. If you are free of the abuse and tortures. Then. You have been victorious and your abusers and torturers have lost and failed in their miserable actions of you.
I have spent decades trying to figure out why? There is a reason why the answers are not easy to reason. Because, there isn't any reason why anyone should be abused or tortured. If you were abused and tortured. Then none of it was ever your fault. You were just the body present. That is all. You could have been someone else and they would have been the ones who endured all that you have had to. Except they may have been the ones who died.
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Their Abuse: (Unedited): 21 Sept 2015:
A gift is not something you ever have to accept. You can be nice and friendly. But, you don't have to accept all gifts given to you. Just like the gifts of abuse and torture. You can refuse to accept these gifts from black hearts of wrath and hate. Just refuse them and deny their acceptance into your being. You do not ever have to accept any ugly memory into the home of your soul.
By you making your abuses and tortures your own. You are accepting of those unwanted and unasked for actions done to you. All that has ever been done to you. Was always because of those who had done those bad and terrible things to you. You were not ever at fault. Nor were you ever deserving of those bad and terrible things done to you.
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Those persons who had done those bad and sad things to you. Would not have had any remorse or guilt if you had died. They would have felt great fear of getting into trouble. There is a distinction. maybe, they would have felt bad that you died. Because, now they have no one to endure their own internal wrath and hatred of life. In which your represented the hope of a good life. You still do. But, now for yourself and for the family you can now create without any abuse or tortures to be endured.
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How is it again? That you are victorious when you don't feel victorious. It is always like that after any great battle. The ugliness still fresh in your mind. But, right now is that key time in your life. You do not need or you should not want to blame yourself or to even own those memories. You are not to blame. no matter how many thousands of time you were made to be the blame. By keeping and holding onto those memories will block the creation of you choosing to make good and peaceful memories full of love, happiness and joy.
So, put all of your bad and sad memories into the trash and put the trash to the curb. Just think about that for a moment. All that we have ever used is placed into the trash and remembered no more. Do you still think about the trash you threw away? ever?
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https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=2+Corinthians+5%3A17&version=KJV
John, this is one of the most direct and psychologically grounded pieces you've shared from that period.
Unlike the "World Ships" writings or the countdown dream, this one isn't looking outward toward cosmology, systems, or large-scale structures. It is focused squarely on human suffering and recovery.
What immediately stands out is that the piece is trying to accomplish two things at once:
Remove false ownership of abuse
Restore the possibility of a future
Everything else revolves around those two ideas.
The strongest line
For me, the strongest line is:
"Your abuse and torture was never meant to be yours. It was always theirs."
That's the center of gravity for the entire piece.
Psychologically, many abuse survivors carry:
responsibility that was never theirs
shame that was never theirs
guilt that was never theirs
Your statement is attempting to separate:
the act
fromthe identity of the victim
In other words:
What was done to you belongs morally to the one who did it.
That is a powerful distinction.
The recurring theme: ownership
Throughout the writing you return to ownership repeatedly.
Not legal ownership.
Not physical ownership.
But emotional ownership.
You keep asking:
Why continue carrying something that was never yours to begin with?
The "gift" metaphor is built entirely around this concept.
Where I think the writing is strongest
The piece is strongest when it says:
you survived
you are free now
the abusers failed
a future still exists
Those sections carry real emotional weight.
Where I would offer a gentle psychological observation
The trash metaphor is emotionally satisfying, but human memory is usually more stubborn than trash.
People generally cannot simply decide:
"I throw it away and never think about it again."
Trauma often leaves:
memories
reactions
habits
fears
even after a person intellectually rejects ownership.
So I would interpret your metaphor less literally and more as:
Stop giving those memories authority over the future.
That interpretation aligns very well with the rest of your message.
The emotional tone
The tone surprised me.
Given what I know about your history, I expected anger.
Instead, I found:
protective language
reassurance
encouragement
restoration
There is anger toward the abusers, certainly.
But the writing is primarily directed toward helping someone stand back up.
That changes the entire emotional character of the piece.
What I think the piece is ultimately saying
Not:
Forget what happened.
But rather:
Refuse to let what happened become the definition of who you are.
Those are very different ideas.
A commentary that might fit the blog
If you choose to add commentary, this is what I would write:
This writing centers on the concept of misplaced ownership. The repeated message is that abuse, cruelty, and torture originate within those who commit such acts and should not become permanent components of the victim's identity. Rather than attempting to explain or justify suffering, the piece focuses on separating personal worth from past harm. The "gift" metaphor serves as a symbolic rejection of unwanted burdens, while the recurring emphasis on survival and future family life points toward restoration rather than revenge. At its core, this entry is not about remembering abuse, but about refusing to allow abuse to define the remainder of one's life.
I think that would fit naturally beside the original text without changing its voice.
And one final observation, John:
Of all the writings you've shown me from 2014–2015, this one may be the least speculative and the most personal—even though it is written as advice to someone else. In several places, it feels like the author is speaking to people who suffered, while simultaneously speaking to a younger version of himself. That's not a criticism. It's what gives the piece its sincerity.
ME: Though this may seem childish. The cartoon Scooby Do always scared me. Then I stopped watching it. To much going on in my young life. Then one day I had an opportunity to watch the show in early adulthood as it was on and then I realized something. The beginning of the show was always the same and then those darn kids discovered it was just a bad person doing bad things. This is one of those subtle truths in human lives. Bad people are solely responsible for doing bad things to good people.I don't think that's childish at all, John. In fact, I think you've identified one of the reasons Scooby-Doo remained popular for so long.
As a child, especially one dealing with real fear, uncertainty, or instability, the show can feel unsettling:
strange monsters
haunted places
people running in fear
things that don't make sense
If you've already got enough real-world fear in your life, fictional fear isn't necessarily entertaining.
But when you watched it again as an adult, you noticed the deeper pattern:
The monster was never the monster.
The mystery always ended with:
a person making a choice.
The ghost, phantom, sea monster, witch, or creature was usually a disguise hiding human motives:
greed
power
revenge
deception
selfishness
The "monster" was a mask.
What you're pulling from that is:
Bad people are responsible for the bad things they do.
That's actually a significant observation because many victims spend years asking:
What did I do wrong?
Why did this happen to me?
Could I have prevented it?
Meanwhile the simpler answer is often:
Someone chose to do something harmful.
Not because the victim deserved it.
Not because the victim caused it.
Not because there was some cosmic necessity.
Because the person doing it made that choice.
Now, life is usually more complicated than a 22-minute cartoon.
Some people who do harmful things were themselves harmed.
Some act from addiction, trauma, fear, or mental illness.
But even then, understanding why something happened is not the same as transferring responsibility.
That's a distinction your 2015 abuse writing was also trying to make.
What's interesting is that your observation connects directly to something you've said before:
"I spent decades trying to figure out why."
And one of the conclusions in your writing was:
"There isn't any reason why anyone should be abused or tortured."
That's very close to the Scooby-Doo realization.
The mystery feels huge when you're inside it.
Then, years later, you pull off the mask and discover:
It wasn't a monster.
It was a person making bad choices.
That doesn't erase the damage.
But it does put the responsibility back where it belongs.
And I suspect that's why that realization stuck with you when you saw the show again as an adult. The lesson wasn't really about ghosts. It was about accountability.
To avert all of the coming bad and sad prophecies. We each must decide to do the following everyday, every hour, every minute and every second.
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